2. Hot Cocoa

 

Okay, so this new tradition fell prey to the classic "expectation" vs "reality" issue that - if I am being honest - has a whole lot to do with why I sometimes shut down in the face of tradition. And I'm going to be blunt here: when Dylan is one of your children, it can be extra hard not to feel that you've let the whole family down.

Bless his heart (and yes, I mean that in the Georgia way), the kid speaks his mind. Always. Even at the expense of others. It drives his brothers crazy, and they try to point out when it happens and provide him with some alternatives, but usually the damage is done.

This time, it was the candy canes. Everyone was SO excited that I had full-sized candy canes for the cocoa. I had no idea that this was going to be the focal point of the event. If I'd had known, I'd have done some things differently.

Like... not dropped the whole box at the store. And then purchased them anyway, figuring they were just for hot chocolate, so broken candy canes would actually be great.

Yeah, I wouldn't have done that.

But I did do precisely that. And Dylan made a super huge deal about it. I let it roll off my back. I'm an old pro. But he mentioned it again. And again. And again. His brothers' hints went from subtle to direct until they were looking him right in the eyes and saying, "It probably doesn't make Mom feel very good when you say those things."

And still he persisted.

I was actually doing pretty okay until after all the redirection he'd gotten from his brothers still didn't instill any compassion. Finally, I had to step in. I had no choice but to be real about it and tell Dylan that he absolutely had to stop mentioning the candy canes.

And then -- the mood shifted. Dylan understood. It was clear to everyone that I was actually fine. And the candy cane debacle became an immediate joke. One we could all share in and laugh about. 

I don't know how it happened that quickly! But I am so glad it did. I didn't ruin Christmas by being open about my feelings, and I think that lesson was one I really needed to learn.

I already made a note to purchase pristine candy canes next year. But something tells me, we'll be laughing about the year Mom bought all broken ones for a long time.