Where the inside of my mind leaks onto the screen.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Great Boots Boots

C'mon, Friends fans.  We all remember Rachel's less-than-successful first day on the job hunt when she enters Central Perk carrying shopping bags and explains her exciting new purchase saying, "They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!"

I think of that nearly every time I wear boots.  And definitely every time I buy boots.

And thanks to a December 2014 adventure with Amy, I now have something new to think of every time I buy boots.

Let me just start the story with this picture.

That red car in the distance is the getaway car of a shoe thief.  Yes, a SHOE THIEF.  Look closely to see how quickly they peeled out of the parking lot!

There we were, standing near the front of Famous Footwear, chattering pleasantly away about the pros and cons of the plentiful selection of boots when we heard a store employee shout, "Stop." Well, in retrospect of knowing the recipient of the yell was actually thieving shoes, it was probably more of a halfhearted shout.  Really, actually, a pretty sorry attempt at convincing someone bent toward thievery to do anything less than run.

And run the thief did.  Right out the front door without so much as a backward glance.  And guess what the store employee did?  NOTHING.  Could shoe thievery truly be such a walk in the park?  Not on my watch, I resolved.  I loaded my cell phone's camera as I ran out into the parking lot, adrenaline pumping at the prospect of helping catch a thief.  I snapped a picture as quickly as I could and...

...No license plate.

Which according to the Famous Footwear dude meant it was worthless to even call in.

But there Amy and I stood, hearts thumping with the excitement of watching someone successfully leave the story with three pair of shoes.

Now, I realize three pair of shoes is just a drop in the Famous Footwear financial bucket.  But three pair of shoes is a HUGE plop in mine.  Amy and I were standing there, trying to figure out the best way to work the BOGO and coupon to pay the least possible amount for my new boots and a pair of Vans for her son.

To think we could have just stood near the entrance and run.  And no one would have even chased us.  Except maybe some crazy lady like me, who wouldn't even get a clear picture.  And we would get off scot-free and...

...No.  Stealing is wrong.  :(

But at least we walked out of Famous Footwear with a great pair of "The Day I Almost Stopped a Shoe Thief but Instead Just Bought Boots" Boots.