That Guy

We have a big household right now.  Our five live downstairs in three bedrooms: Adam & Alex share, Kirk & I share (duh), and Dylan gets his own room.  The three upstairs bedrooms are currently occupied by the Davis family: Skye & Michelle are in the master, and Tyler and Ryder each get their own room.  It's full.  It's a bit crowded (I'm sharing one bathroom with all 4 of my boys).  But it is a ridiculously happy place to live.

Imagine coming home each day and being greeted not only by your own sweet redheaded son but by Princess Tyler, who alternately toddles over or offers you her recently perfected pageant wave.  Some days, I am lucky enough to come home and see one of my older boys holding Ryder on the couch.  But probably my favorite days are the ones when I peek through the blinds of the back door to see my three jumping on the trampoline with Tyler, four giddy faces enjoying a pleasant afternoon.  I still can't believe that Tyler - not yet 1 year old - can hold her own on the trampoline with her crazy cousins, but she loves it.  I can't quite tell whether she prefers to jump herself or to sit atop her perch on Adam's shoulders and let him do all the work.  She seems pretty smiley in either case!

I don't know if Skye and Michelle agree, but Kirk and I talk frequently of how blessed we are to get to share this time with Skye and Michelle.  We get all sorts of geeky happy about the benefits.  It's not often that you know how great and how rare something is when you're right in the middle of it.  But as 8 of the 9 of us sat down to watch Iron Man 3 recently, I couldn't help but feel like the luckiest woman in the world.  On my left sat my loving husband of 12 years with our adoring niece climbing him like a jungle gym.  Behind us, Adam held baby Ryder, feeding him his bottle.  Alex was cuddled in near my right shoulder.  And in the bend of the couch, Dylan had climbed onto Michelle's lap.  Kirk and I whispered happily about how much we love it when it is difficult to see where one family ends and the next begins.

Don't get me wrong - we are really excited about the new house (plans have been sent to the city and we are picking colors) and there are certainly times the house feels crowded.  But I know that when I look back on my life, these 9-ish months are going to stand out as some of the happiest.

I've really enjoyed getting to know my sister.  With six years between us, we weren't particularly close growing up.  As she grew into adulthood, she spent her time away at college, performing in Idaho, or being married to Skye, and I can't really say I even knew her very well.  It turns out Michelle is pretty fun to hang out with, and I really enjoy having her as a friend.  She makes a great Zumba buddy.  She is really good at laughing quietly with me while Dylan explains that I will need to make Halloween costumes for the ants, because they don't have arms and can't use the sewing machine.  She is willing to grocery shop with me.  And she seems to always find little ways to make my life a bit easier.

With all the benefits of our current cohabitation, it would be a bit difficult to pick a favorite thing - that is, if this one thing weren't so clearly my favorite.

Dylan gets to be a big brother.

I know Tyler and Ryder aren't really his siblings, but I'm not sure he knows that.  He gets to love them and be annoyed by them and have to share space with them and learn to be big because it's their turn to be little.  And while listening to him squeal as Tyler chases him through the house may not make the top of my list, watching him take care of Ryder does.

Dylan calls him, "That guy."

"Can I hold that guy?"

"Can I feed that guy?"

I love to watch him plop down on the couch, insisting on a pillow to help support Ryder's head.  I love to watch him sit still, focusing all his attention on holding Ryder's bottle just so.  I love that he's not jealous when my attention is on the brand new baby I sometimes get to hold; he's jealous that he isn't spending time with Ryder.

I like getting to spend time with Skye.  Sometimes we're both leaving for work at the same time, and I get to say a brief hello.  Sometimes he makes me baked penne at midnight when I'm up late working and he feels like cooking.  I like having access to Michelle's closet if I don't have the right pair of shoes to go with my outfit.  I like dragging her with me to the model home to look at colors.  I like the ease of a friendship without drama.  I know I am pretty lucky being one of the first people to see Tyler's hair in pigtails, and her purple polka dotted pajamas are a welcome addition in my BoyTrapped house.

But in Ryder we have another little brother (minus all the work).  A bit of calm in a continuous storm.  And I know our time with "That Guy" is something rare and special.

I know we're just moving across the back fence, but I'm going to miss Those Guys.

The Best Moment

I haven't written much lately.

I know it seems unlikely, but I really haven't had much to say.  Life for the past 10 weeks has mostly been school and Jekyll, and while I am enjoying both, neither really seems like the thing to blog about.

I would love to tell stories about school, but since I know some of my students happened upon my blog last year and since I know parents from my school are also Dickens parents or EYT parents and have easy access here through Facebook, it just doesn't seem ethical.  I could go private, but that really just isn't me.  So if you want to hear fun stories about my 5th grade adventures, we'll have to hang out in person.

Photo Credit: Deanne Jones

I would love to tell stories about Jekyll, but if I wrote down every Jekyll story, you'd all be pretty sick of me by now.  Plus, having Skye and Michelle in the show with me, I get the chance to rehash every story with people who know the people I'm talking about.  I haven't felt the need for my typical public dish.

I would love to tell stories about my family, but frankly, I just haven't been around.  I am starting to make some major life changes to start to remedy that, but the process is a bit slow, and I can only wriggle out of one obligation at a time.  But come mid-December, I intend to have narrowed down my responsibilities to family, work, and one church calling, and I am looking forward to being able to be around to catch the stories firsthand.

There's also the fact that I've been a little down lately, which makes it hard for me to want to sit and write.  Nothing major, I've just been struggling with vocal health.  I've changed my diet, tried every old wives tale in the book, and spent tons of money on high-water-content fruits and veggies and assorted lozenges.  But since my voice is the basis for my vocation, my hobbies, and my personality, it has taken every bit of energy I've just to function.  If I'd been blogging these last few weeks, it would only have been to complain or worry aloud.

But amid all this stuff I haven't really wanted to talk about, it was easy to recognize the best moment of my week and know it was worth documenting.  I even asked Kirk to snag a quick picture.

Sleeping in is great for so many reasons.  But for me, the best moment is a lazy morning when I am still in bed when Dylan wakes up.  Despite his brothers' early start watching t.v. or playing the Wii, Dylan chooses to come quietly into my room.  He crawls up right next to me and cuddles in.  Often, he puts his arms around my neck.  Sometimes, he turns his back to me and wedges his little body right in front of mine.  And he lays there, still and quiet and warm for 10 to 20 minutes.  Of the 10,080 minutes in a week, these 10 are by far my favorite.

My sweet four year old is growing up.  I am grateful he stayed a baby so much longer than the older boys did.  I am grateful that he is still a bit reluctant to be as independent as the others.  I am grateful for the calm he brings into my weekly storm with a sleepy 10 minutes.  Some day he'll choose the brothers and the screen first thing, but I will smile each morning that he chooses this.

It's Phantom LITE

In my experience, most people either seem to know nothing or everything about Frank Wildhorn's Jekyll & Hyde.  If you're in that rare know-it-all group, I probably don't have to tell you why you might not want to bring your kids to my latest performance opportunity.  You already know about the PG-13 language, the violence, and the "career women."  But just in case you've forgotten all the reasons why you might want to bring them, read on.

For the larger group of you who are vaguely aware of the musical's existence but know little beyond the basic idea that Dr. Jekyll is good and Mr. Hyde is bad (and that certainly any show with Mrs. Fife | Sister Fife | Andrea is of course family friendly) may want to do a bit of research before you load up the kids and head to the Empress Theatre for a night of entertainment.

First, let me tell you that I think I've concluded that I will let Adam (8 yrs old) see the show.  But I am going to pass on bringing Alex (6 yrs old) and Dylan (4 yrs old).  And here's why:

Language
If you let your children watch PG-13 movies, then language is no reason to keep them away.  We've cleaned up a few lines, possibly making the language even PG, but I think language sounds much more harsh in person.  Adam is going to hear one "b" plus a smattering of "d"s and "h"s, though the "d"s and "h"s are often to convey their literal meanings as Jekyll literally contends with the devil inside himself.  He's also going to hear the Lord's name taken in vain more than once, though never by me.

Promiscuity
The line around the theater to describe the show's "career women" has been "family flirty."  I haven't seen the costumes yet, but I've heard they will be understated.  I've seen the choreography, and it's nothing I would feel uncomfortable with Adam seeing.  However, not being a mother of the teenage crowd yet, I don't know how I'd feel about kids who "get it" watching.  Again... if you watch PG-13, you certainly won't be seeing anything new.

Violence
Okay, here's one to consider seriously.  I took Dylan to a production of Robin Hood where a man was strangled to death at our feet.  He freaked a bit.  If you don't want your kids to see people dying on stage, don't bring them to Jekyll & Hyde.  8 people die fairly violent deaths.  However, we are not using blood on stage, so they are not gory.  Just violent.  Adam has already seen The Scarlet Pimpernel twice.  I figure if he can handle watching the guillotine, hopefully he'll handle these deaths okay.

Context
The whole show is about the duality that exists in everyone - the good and the evil and the choices we all have to make.  Because of this, the worse we make the "bad" on stage, the clearer the need for "good" becomes.  If you haven't yet guessed, this category is the why I'd encourage you to bring your kids.  Just give them some context first.  Talk about the concepts of free agency on the ride over to the theater.  If Family Home Evening is your thing, do a whole lesson.  I had an incredible discussion with Adam and two young girls in our neighborhood about this idea, and that's when I decided I want Adam to see the show.  He gets it.  Agency.  And since he gets that, I think he's prepared to get some of the rest of it.

The Mrs. Fife Factor
There's a lot of "bad" in the show.  But fortunately for me, I get to play one of the only pure and good characters in the show.  I don't know if I would be comfortable with the kids I teach at school or mentor in the community watching me portray the "bad."  I am pretty sure I would not be okay with Adam having to sort that all out at only eight.  But in this case, it's not an issue.  If you do bring your kids, they will not see Mrs. Fife | Sister Fife | Andrea do anything she wouldn't do in real life.  (Except hug people easily and kiss Henry Jekyll.)

Oh, and if...
You're an adult, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE come see the show.  Even if I wasn't in it.  Jekyll & Hyde is one of my top 3 favorite musicals of all time, not only because I love the music (oh, how I love the music), but because I believe in its message.  I don't want to ruin it for anybody, so I'm not going to publish my overanalyzed love affair with this musical until after closing night, but just know that I strongly encourage you to attend!

So since...
I don't want to post spoilers, enjoy one of my favorite Forbidden Broadway spoofs: "It's Phantom, lite."

(By the way... it's not!)

What We See

A realistic view of "our" dirt

It is definitely interesting to be building in our own neighborhood.  Fun to be able to walk around the corner and take a family picture on "our" dirt.  Fun to already know the neighbors.  But a little weird to have everybody so interested in our dirt's progress.

While I want nothing less than to turn the blog into a step-by-step, it seems important to at least chronicle the big deal days.  Like the day they deposited our earnest money, our contract was accepted, and I finally felt comfortable referring to the new plot of land as "the new house."

As for the other questions (colors, when they'll start digging, etc.) I don't yet know.  But I do know we're moving.  All the way from 3266 to 3267.  Yep.  That's happening.  And I do know it will be exciting to watch the dirt transform from what you see to what we see:

Builder's drawings superimposed on our dirt

Yes, big changes are coming for this little family!

Two Face

"Wait, turn around..." I said to Adam as he left one day for football.  "We'd better make sure we wash off all your makeup."

Who knows if he'll stick with either one, but for about a seven week period, Adam was actively involved both theater and football.  I am grateful he didn't have too many conflicts between the two, because it was fun to support such a well-rounded kid.

I had to laugh one morning when he asked for an alternate breakfast, passing up the high sugar levels of the breakfast cake I'd planned.  "Coach says no sugar during football season."

And I laughed again when we took the kids to Golden Corral on opening night.  Careful to avoid a stomach ache, Adam had selected a well-balanced plate of popcorn shrimp, mashed potatoes, and green beans.  When I mentioned I was pretty impressed by his choices, he explained his plan to follow up with the foods he really wanted, and then to limit himself to only 10 desserts.

Later that evening at the opening night Village Inn party, he and three of his EYT buddies serenaded the mom table with their original song titled, "Maple Syrup."  Arriving at home at midnight, he catalogued nearly 8 hours of sleep before heading off to his first football scrimmage.

I feel pretty grateful to be raising a son who can have a black-streaked face from crying off his mascara one exhausted night and from sweating off his "war paint" the next day.  I feel grateful to live in a community with organized programs designed to teach my son life skills.  As Randy Pausch wrote in The Last Lecture,, the goals of these programs are pretty much always to teach "teamwork, perseverance, sportsmanship, the value of hard work, and ability to deal with adversity."

Theater and athletics may seem to be diametrically opposed, but as Kirk and I have discussed our personal experiences, we've drawn correlations between "notes" and "reviewing film."  There are similarities between "choreography" and "plays."  But right now there's a much stronger bond between our two worlds.

His name is Adam.

The Empy Awards

I almost didn't go to the Empress fundraising and awards gala this year.  Money is tight and time is tighter, and I thought maybe I'd opt out this year.  But at the last minute, a few things changed to make it possible for me to attend, and I was excited to be a part of the "Old Hollywood" theme.

Having attended the gala for the past two seasons, I thought I knew what to expect.  Basically, a night where I would get all excited about dressing up, and then leave to spend a few hours battling my socially awkward tendencies.  I knew this year would be worse, as I was attending without Kirk there to act as a buffer.  As I described it to Michelle, "I'm leaving now.  I'm off to awkwardly try to find someone to sit with and then actually have to talk to them."

"That sounds awful!" she responded.

But I knew also to expect to get to see lots of friends and acquaintances dressed to the nines, get to bid on beautiful baskets in the silent auction, get to watch former cast mates accept their Empy Awards, and (best of all) listen to a talented group of performers introduce the 2014 season with sample performances.

So, despite the looming social discomfort, I really was excited for the evening.

It turns out I didn't know exactly what to expect, because I definitely didn't expect this.

For one thing, the EYT show has in the past been ineligible for the production staff awards.  As its own sort of thing (that the kids pay for, etc), it gets a little bit different treatment (which this year included awards for three of my awesome EYT kids).

For another thing, there were incredible shows on the season last year, each with a fantastic director.  To be honored with the title of best in a group like that was certainly unexpected.

It's extra crazy to think back clear to last summer's show, Beauty and the Beast Jr, and to remember all that went into pulling off such an epic show.

I'm glad they didn't ask for an acceptance speech, because all I would have babbled was, "Thank you."  It would have been difficult for me to express to whom that thanks was directed.  But it definitely goes to the 67 kids who shared the stage, to their dedicated parents who volunteered and lent their kids, to the amazing staff at the Empress including Jake, Michele, and Marie, to Kaylin who saved us nightly with costumes, to Lisa and Katie for assistant directing, to Jamie for her vocal coaching, and to the billion people who helped pull together costumes.  "Best Director" to me is just a compilation of "Best of All Worlds," and I am grateful to have had that opportunity.

And I'm pretty glad I went to the gala... :)

School Smiles

It's time for the traditional back-to-school pics, and I'm jumping on the hold-your-grade bandwagon.  (It's genius!)  While there are times I really love a posed piece of art, there are other times that the forced front-of-house pictures capture the real emotions of the day.

For D, the awaited day meant his very own backpack, a few pair of jeans with no holes in the knees, and a walk around the corner to Mrs. Shayla's Preschool.  His picture capture his general attitude toward the whole idea of school - confusion mixed with general apathy.  He dutifully does what is asked, but without the prior experience of days with friends and tootsie rolls, he has no idea of the fun ahead.

For Al, it meant getting up far earlier than he is accustomed.  For a kid who carries out leisurely morning stretches (yeah, he does that) and suffers from bouts of insomnia (found him on the couch this morning), 8:00 a.m. school is a big deal.  I got him up at 6:30 today, but unfortunately for this kid who can lose focus between syllables, getting ready for the day in a linear fashion is out of the question.  Tomorrow, we'll try 6:20 and see if that allows plenty of time for the occasional foray into Alexland.  Thankfully, by 7:15, he proclaimed himself "not tired anymore," and I caught him mid "I-know-I'm-cute" before rushing off to school.

For Adam, it meant just another day.  He's done it before, he knows the ropes, and he knew the faster I got the picture I wanted, the faster he could resume with life.  He was happy to explain all the full-day-of-school procedures to Alex, and one of my best moments of the day was hearing about his recess time while I was in the teacher lunch room.  Apparently, he spent all of morning recess playing with Alex and proudly telling his friends that his brother is in first grade now.

For me, it meant uncertainty.  My anxiety forced its way into my dreams last night as I dreamed three different scenarios which resulted in us being late on the first day (we were not), one in which my co-teacher erased the initial assignment I'd written on the board last night replacing it with her own (she did not), and one in which my mother told me I might as well withdraw Adam and Alex from NPA right now if I wasn't willing to focus more on their penmanship (um... ??).  But what started as uncertainty faded quickly away as my students filed into the classroom, placing in me the same exact trust as they'd place in any other teacher, replaced with a quiet assuredness.  I've got this!

Even Kirk is in on the back to school theme, since he kept busy today teaching a training class for new hires in his office.  I should have taken a picture of him on his first day of "class" (even though it wasn't today).  It's been fun to hear his stories of successes in his own classroom, especially since he used to dream of being a math teacher.

Day one has come and gone (day 3 for D), and although I haven't gotten to check in with the kids yet, I'm betting everyone is all smiles.  Don't let D fool you... this is his smile.