Where the inside of my mind leaks onto the screen.

Monday, April 30, 2012

Just Keep Swimming

I always feel that if my stress is self-induced, I give up the right to complain.  So I'm going to try really hard to not whine about the poor planning I did with regards to the kids schedules that resulted in weekly piano lessons for one, gymnastics for the other, rehearsals 2-4 times per week, and bi-weekly baseball games.  And I'm not going to dwell on the loss I find myself at considering I'm frequently gone for class, busy planning Trek, or attempting not to suck at my callings.  I somehow accidentally chose all that.

Instead, I'm going to attempt to post the rewarding moments that remind me why I do what I do.

Exhibit A:

Yep.  I wrote a song for Trek.  And by all musical merits, it's just a dumb little song.  But the beginnings of a trek choir I have going enjoy singing it.  A lot.  Validation that the time I spent was worth it?  Check.  Meager hope that the youth might think I'm at least a little cool?  Check.

Exhibit B:
I wasn't there for Adam's first baseball game this season, due to a Trek conflict.  But thanks to a kind neighbor who was at the game, I didn't have to totally miss out.

And when I received her email today, it made my day to know that someone had been thinking of me.

Exhibit C:
My new primary buddy made it through 20 minutes of primary yesterday both calm and awake.  (Thus far I've only been able to achieve meltdown or sleeping.)  And he expanded the list of words he usually says repetitively to himself/me to include positive phrases like "You're a good boy," and "Wow-ee!," instead of the typical, "Are you alright?" and "Oh, no!"

So later this week when I miss Adam's school performance debut as Paul Revere because I'll be busy teaching in the adjacent classroom, when I miss his second baseball game because I'm busy transporting Alex to gymnastics, or when I eat-and-run to make it to class on time, I'll be able to remember that the choices I make are worth it to me, and I can just keep swimming.